If you are trying to learn how to get an old girlfriend back, I have both good news and bad news for you. Ok, the bad news goes first. Sadly there is no sure win way to get a former lover back. In many situations the other person may have already moved on for good. You will have no choice but to cope with that and go on with a new life.
On the other hand, the good news is that if you’re willing to control and make improvement to some of your more natural instincts, you can become more desirable. Eventually you find that your former lover has started to attract by you for another time.
The first instinct you should curb is to scream at them whenever you see your ex around. This is a very natural reaction when you are upset and shocked by the split up, or the other person has been dishonest to you. But, you must control your emotions if you want to have a decent chance to reconcile with her later. If you behave more civil to your ex, she is more likely to become receptive to you for another time. The next time when you meet her to return items, make jokes on some old events and make her laugh. This may not seem to have any impact on your love recovery process right now, but it can be the tipping point later.
The next instinct to control is related to the quick decision that many people made immediately before even find out how things will go. For example, when being too desperate to get their ex back, many people somehow do not really bother or contemplate enough if the relationship will be close or far away from their exes as long as they can get back together. This isn’t right. The relationship indeed should develop naturally. It is best that you let them see you once in a while at parties. Then, you can work towards becoming a close friend. Don’t rush things and let your ex lover decide which way she wants to go. It can help to reignite a relationship and bring back the spark.
Lastly, the last instinct that you should control is to pester them and force the issues. Many people push their former lovers to give them a decision if they want to reconcile while they are not ready to do it. Since you have just spilt up with them, you will sure receive a negative response if you push on the issue. Instead, what they need now is the breathing space. So, relax and push slowly later. You need to wait until they have gotten over the emotions that caused the relationship to break.