Category Archives: Cure Pain

Best Way Recovering from a Breakup

You probably want to see that person one minute and feel to kill them the next. This is expected when you are trying to get over someone. So, are you looking for a proven, or a fastest, or a best way of recovering from a breakup? Well, all situations are unique, and so there is no best solution that works for any single relationship.

When mourning over someone who has passed on, there are different stages of grief that the family will have to go through. In fact, in a breakup situation you are also required to go through some steps to get over that person. A woman whose first husband died in a car accident and her second partner spilt up with her have shared her experience that it is indeed tougher to recover from a breakup than to suffer the death of her late husband. Part of the reasons is that there is plenty of societal support when someone passed on. You literally have to do it all alone when getting over a breakup.

The first thing is to pour out all your feelings and emotions towards your ex in a piece of paper. Write down all the good experiences the two of you have had together, list the reasons why you fall for them, and describe your feelings about the breakup. You can emote in this letter because no one will ever read it. It will be burnt always later. There isn’t any ritual that people use to wrap up a relationship, but this will certainly be a great help for your emotional recovery process.

When a relationship has ended, it is common for couple to arrange a time to exchange things. You are likely to have some items of theirs at your home, and they have got your stuff at theirs. Both people would probably want to have these things back. So, plan a time for the exchange. There may be some items that your former partner does not want them back. You can either throw them away or store them up. Don’t leave anything in your house that can remind you of them while you are trying very hard to get over someone. If there is any gifts that came from your ex such as a photo frame or a watch, store them away so that you won’t think of them each time when looking at the time or the photo in the frame.

Sometimes, couples may have some financial matters that need to be sorted out when the love is over. If you have a joint bank account, discuss with your ex how to divvy it up and then close it. If one partner owes the other person money, try to pay it off by taking a loan or using your own fund.

In order to get over that person, you need to close out everything that both people are sharing. When all these are done, have an agreement with them that there will be no communication for a month. It means no phone calls, text messages, emails, or running in to each other “by accident.” You may want to avoid going to places that both people used to go together. This allows the two of you to start building your own life.

When things begin to settle down, you can once again interact with them if needed. Give yourself plenty of space to go through this difficult period and to get over the breakup.

How to Survive a Breakup – Helpful Advice!

If you are dumped by someone recently, I am sure you want to know how to survive a breakup. No matter who has asked for the divide, both partners will suffer a great deal of pain. But, remember this! Even though the relationship has broken, you are definitely not a broken person.

It is normal for people to have some fears at this stage. First, there is a worry you won’t be able to cope with the pain. Second, you can’t find another similar romance again.

Take heart, my friend. While one chapter of your life may have just finished, your whole life is not. You will get over the fear one day although the pain and worry are real right now.

Even though that person has left, the friends and family are still around. They love you as much as your ex partner did in the past, and you can spend more time with them now. Quite often when someone gets into a serious relationship, they lose touch with those who also mean a lot to their lives. There is no better time than now to reconnect with them.

When you start to share the painful experience on the breakup, you find that they will also share something about their past.  Soon you learn that there is nothing unique about your situation. Other people have also experienced through the same pain and lived full lives after getting over their breakups. Besides spending more time connecting with people who you care about, there is also more time now for you to work on problems in your life. When two people are in a romantic relationship, a lot of time one partner may just adopt to the needs and interests of the other person. This is the best time to revisit some of those things that were pushed aside previously but interest you.

If you can’t think of any activity, then consider taking up a hobby. There are almost unlimited things you can get involved in. Some of the good activities are group events such as joining a course, a workshop, or even doing charity work. For example, joining a dancing class will let you meet people who know how to enjoy the finer things in life. If you like Chinese food, you can join a Chinese cooking class. You can also do charity works such as helping others in the old folk’s home or orphan house which can occupy your time to do something really meaningful.

When you start to re-engage with the outside world again, you occupy yourself and won’t have much time to think of the relationship. You can make more new friends with common interest, or even meet someone who is special to you.   The truth is that your soul mate is somewhere out there. You will bump into them one day and start dating again.

When looking back at the relationship at that point, you find that your old partner have in fact done you a great favor for splitting up so that you can find another person who is much better.

Best Way How to Deal with Breaking Up — 5 Emotional Stages

Both partners will go through different emotions in the process of a relationship breakup. No matter who has initiated it, both couple will experience a roller coaster ride and need to deal with the pain. If someone has been a big part of your life, now things are no longer be the same again.

It may be easier to get through the crisis if you are aware of the different emotions and steps that will hit you. There is no shortcut for the healing process, and if you don’t deal with the different stages of the emotions, then you may not be able to heal completely. It can leave a long term effect to your future life, or cause trouble for you to fall in love again.

There are a few factors that will determine how long it takes to get over someone. Every relationship is different, and it depends on the individual’s capability to handle the situation. Someone who is cheerful and confident of themself may likely be able to go through the healing faster and easier than someone who is lacking of self-confidence and less happy of themself.

Here are 5 stages of a breakup.

1. Pain
The immediate feeling that hits you is the pain. It often begins with a certain level of disbelief and follows by a lot of pain. At this point you just want to hide in a corner and refuse to see anyone including friends and family. Everything you do require a lot of energy. Also, you have trouble in sleeping and don’t feel like eating at all.

2. Denial
Next, you don’t want to believe that the breakup is real. You think it happens only for temporary, and as soon as your partner realizes they made a mistake, they will make up with you and things will return back to normal. You may relax a bit and linger on this denial stage. But in fact, it is quite destructive as it prevents you from going forward and finishing the complete recovery cycle.

3. Anger
All the feelings that come from the last two stages are now turning into anger. You don’t understand why they treated you like this, and how you ended up in such a situation. Your emotions run high at this point which can affect your actions and behaviors. You really need to be careful for not doing anything damaging or hurtful that you may regret in future. If you can’t move past this stage of anger, you may have difficulty to own a happy relationship with another person.

4. Grief
In the grieving stage, you will mourn the ending of a relationship the same way you mourn when a loved one passed on.  As your ex is no longer being part of your life, the feeling will be hurtful. Most people in this phase will grieve, and then move on. Be careful not to get into a depression.

5. Acceptance
When you reach this final stage, you realize that the love is gone. You finally accept the reality and start to think about your own future. The past relationship and your ex partner are now just part of the history. You are looking forward for a better tomorrow and the possibility to find a new love again.

Knowing the different stages of emotions you face, it allows you to work through them much easier. All these steps are normal, and when you have successfully worked pass them, you find yourself starting to look forward for a better future.

Getting Over your First Love – Top 4 Ways

“The first cut is the deepest.” May be this describes your present situation. Getting over your first love is a tough job. When the two of you fell in love, you put all of your emotions and the whole heart on that person. Now the feeling is really distressing when the relationship has come to an end. You feel that you will never want to fall in love for another time, and things will never be the same again.

To get over someone especially for your first love, a lot of conscious effort will be needed to mend the broken heart. While there are plenty of methods to use, given below are 4 tips that can help to heal your feelings as soon as possible.

1. Have a rebound relationship
Some people jump into a rebound relationship trying to mask the breakup pain and distract from the full extent of heartbreak. It is a temporary solution to cope with a broken heart and fix the emotional pain. However, the process involves using another person to help overcoming your ordeal. Some people may not agree to this method.

2. Treat yourself well with good things
Take good care of yourself while trying to mend a heartbreak. Reward yourself with some of your favorite things such as foods and enjoyment to allow youself to feel a little bit more happy during this difficult period.

3. Surround yourself with family, loved ones and friends
One of the best ways to ease pain is to get emotional support and surround yourself with friends and family members. Spending more time with them on group activities will let you forget about the breakup for temporary. You will gradually get over the loss.

4. Talk to a professional
If your ordeal doesn’t seem to settle down after a few months, you can consider talking to a counselor. Sometimes the ordeal can turn into a depression. So, the professionals are trained to help people to handle such situation, and they are good in putting things in perspective.  You can share thoughts openly and freely, and they will help to deal with your pain and breakup so that you can move on quickly.

Every relationship is different, and the level of success in reconciliation will also be different. While some people may find it helpful to heal their emotions by surrounding themselves with family and friends, others think that a rebound relationship helps them to forget about the breakup. You probably need to find out which is the best way that works for you. Take care!

Surviving a Relationship Breakup — Tough but Possible

Surviving a relationship breakup is a difficult task for both partners. It relies tremendously on the strength of an individual to deal with the hurtful emotions and feelings. The process is going to be daunting especially when there is a big gap in your chest. Nothing can fill that gap to ease the pain. However, to let you feel a little bit better, you should know that you are not the first couple who went through a breakup and definitely not the last pair. You should take solace in that both people will eventually recover from the ordeal and move forward.

There are plenty of useful tips to help people to survive a breakup. The first method is not to suppress the pain, but let it out. The grief of a breakup is as bad as the pain coming from the loss of a loved one. So, the process will be hurtful, and if needed, it is completely ok to break down and cry. You can scream, yell, write down something, and do whatever is needed to release the pain and move on. But, just don’t get in to doing things that hurt yourself.

When you are able to put the emotions in check and reach a calm state, then it is time to think about things and determine where you are in the relationship. Having a clear picture of the stage you are in will allow you to make decisive decision and come to terms with your partner that the relationship is really over.

The next step requires both people to remove the overlaps such as exchanging and returning back some items. This is to ensure that there is nothing left in your property that will act as a reminder of them in future. When both people have completed the spilt up, you can perform a ritual to wrap up the relationship. It will be a symbolic event that removes the effigy of your ex through getting rid of some stuff. You can burn away their clothes, photos and letters, throw away all their leftovers, and delete their folders in your laptop and gadgets. All these are for the benefit of you when moving on to a new life.

At this time, try to make use of all the available support from family and friends. They can always provide you the necessary emotional support. No matter how much you have done to reduce the effect of a breakup, you will still experience a certain level of pain. So, you need all the support you can have to get over the grief. Don’t hesitate if you need to talk to a professional for expert advice. Help is always out there. Good luck!